22 Apr 2009

Women's Dictionary - Part I

If the topic itself has made you click on it and got you here, then trust me you would not be disappointed. I had got this email long time back and thanks to the art of Forwarding emails, it has probably reached your inbox sometime or another. For those who are lucky enough not to get forwarded mails, here it is....

I would recommend that women don't read further. I don't want to be criticised of being AGAINST my own kind. :P

Ok...So here goes....

They say women never say what they want..As a matter of fact, they always tell you EXACTLY what they want. Its just the matter of decoding it...So here you go...Some of the basic codes, specially decoded for you.

  1. You want...You want : We need OR I want.

  2. It's your decision: The correct decision should be obvious by now.

  3. Do what you want: You'll pay for this later.

  4. We need to talk: I need to complain.

  5. Sure . . . go ahead: This is a dare, not permission.. Don't Do It!

  6. I'm not upset: Of course I'm upset, you moron.

  7. You're . . . so manly: You need a shave and you sweat a lot.

  8. Be romantic, turn out the lights: I have flabby thighs.

  9. This kitchen is so inconvenient: I want a new house:

  10. I want new curtains: ..and carpeting, furniture and wallpaper

  11. Hang the picture there: No, I mean hang it there!

  12. I heard a noise: I noticed you were almost asleep.

  13. Do you love me?: I'm going to ask for something expensive.
  14. How much do you love me?: I did something today you're not going to like.

  15. I'll be ready in a minute: Kick off your shoes and find a good game on TV.

  16. Am I fat?: Tell me I'm beautiful.

  17. You have to learn to communicate: Just agree with me.

  18. Are you listening to me?: Too late, you're dead.

  19. Yes: No.

  20. No: No.

  21. Maybe: No.

  22. I'm sorry: You'll be sorry.

  23. Do you like this recipe?: It's easy to fix, so you'd better get used to it.

  24. I'm not yelling!: Yes I am yelling because I think this is important.
  25. That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a womencan make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hardbefore deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake


26. The same old thing: Nothing.

27. Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something,and you should be on your toes.

28. Everything: My PMS is acting up.

29. Nothing, really: It's just that you are such a jerk.

30. I don't want to talk about it: Go away I'm still building up evidence against you.

So now you understand, Why women can get so complicated to understand??

You might want to try it and let me know if I was of any help... till then adios and good luck


Sudhindra said...

Phew!!! I always knew women are confusing... But after reading this, got to know that they are far more confusing than I thought!!

And what abt men?? Do u have any research on men too?? may be some rapidfire answers?? ;-)

Tanvi said...

Not a bad idea for my next topic sudhindra??

so lets find out from all the men...if they want to answer some rapid fire questions for helping me understand their species better for my next blog???

magiceye said...

have never believed in stereotypes..

Tanvi said...

Well, Its a joke magiceye...As i said, its a forwarded mail..

Anand said...

Yea..I had got this forwared mail sometime back. This one and some others like this one keep doin their rounds over the globe.

But yea....dude...women r real confusing to figure out.

And when u figuring out how men r like?? Sudhindra asked the right que. lol.

Tanvi said...

@ anand: well, I would give the same answer to you as well. Help me figure your species out, coz as far as I know, your life revolves around the 3Bs...Bucks, Bikes and Babes.....lol

Ofcourse, I might be wrong.

Anand said...

Too confused to figure such things. Id rather do smething easier like playing with hungry lions.

Tanvi said...

Haha, I rest my case anand. The thing that is worse than confusing conversations is completely avoiding them. But It seems you have given me the borderline perception of the way men react to certain situations.

Some day I intend to write a post on that. I am hoping my fellow female bloggers will help me. Hahaha

alok said...

gud collection....the topic is endless...i have a big collection, sending u in mail.sample:-
A man will pay $20 for a $10 item he needs.
A woman will pay $10 for a $20 item that she doesn't need.

Tanvi said...

well said alok.

My next blog would be targetting men...So look out for it...

alok said...

oops....never thought my comment will anger u so much :P

Tanvi said...

Haha...Alok...didnt intend to scare you. I mean it...a lot of my friends have liked this blog, so its time I write something for my own kind also..(women)...lol

Double-Dolphin said...

"We need to talk" also means "you are in BIG trouble"...ha ha he he

अनिल कान्त : said...

haan kaafi kuchh match karti hai ...lekin ye itni badi hai ki men kabhi use yaad nahi kar payenge :) :)

Tanvi said...

U r right. Maybe u could share few experiences with us.

Anonymous said...

Like ur post and especially
this comment "the 3Bs...Bucks, Bikes and Babes", really cool one! LOL And so true!!!!